Experiences

I think it's time to broach the subject of the past. I try to keep my outlook pretty positive on this blog, but sometimes some deep soul searching and some hard truths are just necessary for learning.
I really like experiences. I like trying new things- daring things. Stupid things, sometimes. My general response is, "I just wanted to say that I have done it." As a result, I've been places and done things that, frankly, I regret.
I think experience is an idol of mine. I feel like my life has just got to be exciting or I'll just blow up inside. So I went searching for an exciting life experience on my own. "I'll just dip my hand in this, so I can say I've done it." "I'll go to this place by myself- because I can." In the past couple years, I've exercised a lot of free will.
The real kicker is that it just didn't fill me up. I thought that I could live an adventure on my own, and it really just made me depressed.
Sometimes I speak words of wisdom that I quickly forget and just don't use them in my own life. Once, I was talking to a good friend about celebrities and all the good things they like to do with their money. I mentioned Brangelina and how they consistently take trips to third world countries- that they are passionate about it. That's fantastic. I'm glad that people like them exist in the world. But what I said then I should have taken into deeper consideration and applied in my own life: What they're doing, it's all mortal. They're feeding, clothing, housing their bodies. I'm sure it's exciting to get to do that for those who cannot do it for themselves. How much more exciting is it to do good things in the name of God? We can feed, clothe, and house their bodies, yes; but what we do is immortal. Because when we serve their mortal bodies, we should also be feeding their spirits. What we do for them will extend beyond this life and reach into eternity.
How exciting can you get? Everything we do leaves a mark in heaven (or it should, at any rate). It makes everything else that we try to do for excitement pale in comparison.
I wish I would have taken my own words to heart a little sooner, but I know that He has amazing things ahead for me that I'm not even imagining. And I'm learning that the more I let go of the experiences I had planned for myself, the more He heaps on new opportunities to serve, lead, and fight for Him.